Tag Archives: road map

Grateful for the Example Set

Growing up with squinted eyes blinded by the light of a seemingly untouchable force of grounded pragmatism and consistency made for an interesting cocktail of security and rebellion. Organized order, punctuality, and checked boxes built a foundation of unwavering dependability. With only one captain on the ship, there were few available alternatives. But oats strain to be sewn, and rigid rules stand as giant impediments to any misguided notion of freedom.

While nonchalantly savoring the spoils born from a hard-working parent’s willingness to haul that load alone, I dismissed the concept of a career that fit snugly into a spreadsheet schedule and haphazardly charged into the sandstorm of artistic instability. Assuming that everything would simply “work out” has made for a marathon of quicksand sprinting and rugs that seem destined to be pulled just when I think my feet are stable.

My life was so regimented and routine, I couldn’t fathom my work following suit. I felt compelled to float on top of that salted sea of possibilities and available options, so a door could always remain open when the need to run or pivot presented itself. I made certain no relationship would sustain, no child would be born, and no personalized nameplate would ever adorn some mahogany office throne.

Well, I got exactly what I wanted. By eschewing balance and structure, I have floated inside an artistic bubble, arbitrarily drifting from one project to the next. Dreams imagined. Dreams crushed. Blueprints written. Blueprints erased. Never seeing past the three illuminated feet in front of you makes for a precarious stroll, and my walking stick is now saddled with an inconspicuous nub.

I cursorily studied a road map clearly created by the cartographer responsible, and I wish I had at least learned to split the difference between margins and maybes. I will never live up to that example set, but I am beyond grateful for the cataloged tray of nuts and bolts offered to build my engine.

Adolescence Interrupted

Turning Tables

table3

Find me a streak of consistency and I’ll show you how quickly presumption becomes disbelief. As I’ve stated many times in this collection of musings, the only constant is change. When we feel like we’re clutching the frayed end of a rope with our last knuckle, that same line is used to pull us from the pit. Dark days are followed by sunny opportunities and the ever-evolving journey of human existence continues on its path, pushed only by a vague sense of purpose, happenstance, and luck. But hold on for that final loop because it just might be the ride that reveals what you needed to see.

A combination of opportunity and rewards from past behavior have united to alter the landscape of what I previously thought was a smooth passageway beneath the mountains, through the valley. I like my roads traversed—the brush beaten—to offer an unobstructed view and the absence of pitfalls. But without risk, there is no reward, and the flatline life, in all its predictability, neither challenges the mind nor nurtures the soul. So a lot of stress and a little shaking of the Yahtzee dice flipped my table on its top. I stepped to the edge of the unknown and jumped.

What the future has in store is heavy with potential and the hope of a portrait painted with fresh colors is no longer conjecture, but fact. I’ve saddled my steed and strapped in for the long haul. Through collaborative effort and a discerning view of the map at my feet, I’m finally able to grip the reigns of my future and steer.

Adolescence Interrupted